Warren, As a woman I feel a little strange about making the first move, and yet I see matches I would really like to begin exchanging messages with.
If I initiate communication with them, will I come across as not much of a challenge?
In fact, it’s even tougher for guys, because in general, historically and culturally, they are the ones expected to make the first move, even if we’re now living in a much more gender-equal world, than ever before.
On the other hand, the fact that ladies are not expected to make the first move makes things even harder for girls, especially, if you’re naturally shy, but you have a huge crush on a guy.
They noted that social expectations discouraged women from directly pursuing potential partners and “encouraged [women] to resort to passivity or indirect strategies to shape their relationship outcomes” (p. Many women developed a kind of learned helplessness or feeling of futility about changing the status quo which, in turn, perpetuated conformity to societal expectations.
Using a sample of 92 single undergraduates (50 women, 42 men), Mac Gregor and Cavallo first established that there was a positive relationship between feelings of control over relationship initiation and the amount of effort a woman would put into initiating romantic relationships.
6 Tips on how to make the first move on your crush, if you are shy Should a girl make the first move?
This perspective is quite common, and may be right for you when dating in person.
In fact, my ex approached me on a dance floor; she walked right up to me and asked to dance.
I was a little taken back because it is not the norm; however, her confidence impressed me and I was attracted from the get-go.
Maybe you stick to the old-fashioned route; maybe you are scared of rejection; maybe you simply do not know how to approach a man. We, too, hate rejection and embarrassment, and some of us have no clue how to approach women.
As a man, I can tell you that we do not mind a woman approaching us.